mock my beans

an overwhelming sense of nostalgia swept over me yesterday as i saw some of the people from hcc that i used to hang with back in elementary school. dunno if any of you still remember this jack-in-the-box commercial that aired about 7 years ago. i don't really remember any of the details of the commercial, just jack ending everything with the line "mock my beans." well ever since then, i guess those hcc kids haven't forgotten it, and they still yelled it out yesterday when they saw me. haha just reminiscing of stuff back at hcc, like playing ball outside in the blistering heat after sunday service, or crowding into pastor fred tow's office with a couple of my buds to trade basketball cards (hehe i even remember being willing to trade ANY card for sam cassell, my favoritest player in the world back then =P ), and even discovery camp. man, we go way back, and just to see how much they've changed (and how much they really haven't) is just so awesome.

speaking of AWESOME, you know who else is awesome?? God! hehe believe it or not, this past week of almost constant smiling has left my face kinda sore. but it feels SO good. it's been so encouraging to read and hear what other people have to say about how God has been working in their lives as well. it's an even more incredible feeling to realize that this is just the BEGINNING. camp and its immediate after-effects are just the start of something even more grand, even MORE AWESOME. im anxious to see what college has to offer. sure, it may take a bit of time to get used to everything, but im sure God won't let me down, cause he's faithful like that. =)

anyhooo, my cousins are back!! and my grandma too!! bam, just another answered prayer; they arrived in houston yesterday on schedule, which is pretty amazing cuz they hadda make a stop at newark airport, and yeah, with that whole blackout thing i was pretty sure the flight would get delayed. but praise God! from just one night, i think my canton has already improved =P

ah, 1 week. college. i'll take this as my leap of faith. catch me, Father.

God is AWESOME!!

need i say more?!

..didn't think so. =)

fallin f0r Y0U: im going to canton retreat
littlecanoe4111: yah.. that's what i thought
littlecanoe4111: WHAT?!?!?!?
littlecanoe4111: what canton retreat???
fallin f0r Y0U: ...
fallin f0r Y0U: lol
fallin f0r Y0U: you're not canton..
littlecanoe4111: why are you discriminating against noncantons??
fallin f0r Y0U: which is why you probably didnt hear about it
fallin f0r Y0U: :-P
littlecanoe4111: why is there no mandarin retreat?
littlecanoe4111: or mainlander retreat?
fallin f0r Y0U: cuz cantons are cool
fallin f0r Y0U: which is more than i can say about you guys
littlecanoe4111: whatever!!!
fallin f0r Y0U: :-D
littlecanoe4111: you guys NEED to a retreat
littlecanoe4111: to bond together
littlecanoe4111: or else you'd all be picked apart
littlecanoe4111: one at a time
littlecanoe4111: slowly and painfully
fallin f0r Y0U: em...yeah
fallin f0r Y0U: i dont see anyone with MAINLANDER PRIDE now do i
fallin f0r Y0U: eh? eh?
fallin f0r Y0U: yeah thats right
littlecanoe4111: I HAVE MAINLANDER PRIDE!!!!
fallin f0r Y0U: cantons fo life
fallin f0r Y0U: and, you stand alone
fallin f0r Y0U: *looking around*
fallin f0r Y0U: yep, you stand alone. very alone.
littlecanoe4111: *sniffle*
littlecanoe4111: *sniff*
fallin f0r Y0U: there there..its ok..
fallin f0r Y0U: not EVERYONE can be canton
fallin f0r Y0U: :-P
littlecanoe4111: =(.... WAHHH!!!!!
fallin f0r Y0U: hahahha
littlecanoe4111: :-(
littlecanoe4111: :'(
littlecanoe4111: i can't believe you can be so cruel
fallin f0r Y0U: didnt you learn anything from ryan?
fallin f0r Y0U: suck it up

canton pride =)

oh, and thanks ryan, wherever you are. love ya man. :D

A smile is a light in the window of the soul indicating that the heart is at home..

it's strange. it all started on the first day of camp challenge. it was the first evening of worship, and all of a sudden, as i was singing, i just couldn't help but smile. i can't explain it. it just brings me so much joy thinking about the words i'm singing. even while im driving in the car, im constantly listening to my awesome wow worship cd =) and just singing along, with a smile from ear to ear. mark twain once said, "Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been." man, at this rate, my face is gonna be one big wrinkle by my 20th birthday.

JPG fugitives..

so today xiao, simon, peter, annie, and i decide to visit clements. at about 11, xiao and i walk into the front office to ask for visitor's passes. i knew it was a bad idea, cause as it turns out, mr. mckie told us to wait until next week to visit. so, eh..yeah, that left us with no excuse if we were caught staying there. but we decided to stick around anyways and ended up visiting all 3 lunches. *sigh* looks like everyone got scattered this year. hehe the whole time xiao and i were just trying to sneak around without getting caught by any of the principals =P. i shoulda brought a backpack or a textbook or something; i was just walking around with a box of fruit roll-ups =P. so, yeah, it was pretty hard to blend in, but both xiao and i felt like a couple of fugitives just creeping around the hallways. but, yeah, i must say that it definitely feels weird walking into school again. it makes me feel so old..but then again, good thing someone was quick to point out "that's cause you ARE old." great. well, i guess im as ready for college now as i'll ever be. it was really encouraging seeing everyone at school again. lots of memories, and of course, there's so many more to come for you guys. enjoy the school year!

a little encouragement for all you high schoolers...
HAVE FUN AT SCHOOL TOMORROW!!!

i know this is the day many of you have dreaded for a while; for some of you it's your first day of school as a SENIOR, the oldest kids of the bunch, and that can definitely feel weird right now. but it's really important to go in with a positive attitude, seeking to be leaders at your school. i know one main reason i wish i could have one last year in high school is that i wish i had taken all the opportunities at school to really reach out to my nonchristian friends. yeah sure, it's tough and a bit awkward, but just think: you're doing it for the Big Guy up there.

i'll be praying for all you guys!

why do people work out?

since returning home from camp, i have yet to pick up a single dumbbell. for me, this feeling is kinda weird cuz for the entire summer, i have basically been working out every day. but for some reason, i have seemingly lost all motivation to work out. i seriously don't understand. why exactly do people work out?

discussed this with some people, and xiao said something to the effect of "to look good for other people." man, how true. but, at the same time, what a terrible reason. i guess that was my motivation before, but searching for a better answer, i asked simon. mr. yau, after pondering for a bit, answered with "i wanna be strong so i can protect myself.." as you could have guessed, neither xiao or myself could refrain from laughing after hearing this. but i guess his answer is a lot more legitimate and reasonable than xiao's, so i gotta give him credit for that. but i still need some sorta inspiring motivation. i don't just wanna work out just so other people can see me or just so eh..i can "protect" myself from bad guys. and plus, the only person who's gonna see me without a shirt on for the next year or so is probably gonna be peter, so thats no good either. don't wanna cause him to stumble or anything =P. i guess phil's reply was the best i could get: philphil789: cuz u wanna beat me in arm wrestling.

oh well, at least for now, ive lost all motivation to work out. maybe later when im at UT with nothing to do, i'll start pumping that iron again. but as for now, someone please enlighten me.

my family was driving back home from dinner today, when i decided to turn on the radio. we were packed in the van, or the "ungodly" car as alex yang likes to call it. why, you ask? b/c for some reason, the radio in the van can't get any reception to 89.3 or 99.7 ksbj. so we decided to listen to some other music, namely, 97.9 the box, 104 krbe, and party 104.9. after hearing that, i don't see how anyone could really appreciate that kinda music. i mean, no offense, cause i know thats the music i used to listen to 24/7, but now that i try to listen to it, i can't stand it for some reason. iono what it is exactly, but the music just made me sick to my stomach. so, yeah, from now on, wow worship cd 24/7 :)

the me He wants me to be..

it's so hard for me to recognize my personal weaknesses and shortcomings. i guess the thing i struggle with most is patience. i realize that no matter how other people may view me, God is the only one who really knows the ways of my heart and the thoughts of my mind. i trust that through time, He will change me into the person He really wants me to be. no matter how long it may take, i can rest assured knowing that it will definitely be worth the wait.

Surrender
I’m giving You my heart and all that is within
I lay it all down for the sake of You my King
I’m giving you my dreams, I’m laying down my rights
I’m giving up my pride for the promise of new life

And I surrender
All to You, all to You
And I surrender
All to You, all to You

I’m singing You this song, I’m waiting at the cross
And all the world holds dear, I count it all as loss
For the sake of knowing You, the glory of Your name
To know the lasting joy, even sharing in Your pain

my heart, my dreams, my rights, my pride, my all.

oh btw, camp pics are up. well, 24 of them. i realized i never finished my tributes thing on my blog, so theres some tributes there to some people who arent gonna be going up to UT with me. only took maybe 40 pics altogether at camp, which is kinda surprising.

anyways, im working on a collage thing for my dorm room. so please, if you have any pictures at all that are just lying around, or if you wanna just gimme some cool pics so i can see your lovely face every day, just gimme some asap! hehe thanks a lot.

went to clements today with brother and sister so they could get their books, locker assignments, and pictures taken. going there, i realized im a lot more mentally prepared for college than i thought. cuz, for the first time ever, it felt weird being in that building. kinda hard to explain, but then again, im a weird person. there were quite a bit of short freshmen there, along with their parents. seeing them just brought back so many memories. it seems like it was just yesterday when i was in their exact same position. excited for high school, yet not being sure if i was really ready. and hey, 4 years later, i guess im feeling the exact same way towards college. it was an awesome feeling being able to help some people out though. kinda weird how people would just come up to me and ask questions about the school, or about lockers or something like that. haha i guess i look older than i thought =P

2 weeks. it's gonna be so hard to say goodbye..

He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
and hears me when i call...

learned so many things at camp this year. things about myself, things about God, and things about my friends. i realized i take my friends for granted without even knowing it. i feel so thankful now, knowing that im so blessed to have so many people who i know i can trust with my life. everyone needs true friends who will tell you what's on their mind, even though they may know that it's the last thing you want to hear. i thank all my friends for always being so incredibly willing to listen (no fingernails).

above anything else, i thank God for revealing to me that He always knows what's best. even though my instinct is to take things into my own hands, i know that God's timing is always perfect. had to make a seemingly impossible decision at camp, but i praise God for showing me the right direction to take. it's strange how sometimes the most difficult thing you might ever have to do is nothing at all. i just really discovered what it meant to surrender ALL to Him.

on the second night after the message, we broke up into our small groups. john prayed for the group real quick and decided that we should just walk together in silence and let God speak to each one of us. i had so much on my mind, and so i pulled my visor down to right above my eyes so i wouldn't allow my eyes to wander around and distract me from thinking. so, as i followed john, i couldn't see to my left or my right, all i saw were john's feet in front of me as i walked in silence. then it just hit me. that's EXACTLY how i need to approach my life. sure, it's human nature to want to be in control of a situation, but what i really need to do is just follow in God's footsteps. i didn't know where i was heading or what was coming my way, but i knew that john could see ahead of him. in the same way, only God knows what my future holds, and i just need to trust that He will guide me along the right path.

so, no matter what the future brings, it's reassuring to know that if it's in God's will, if it's meant to be, He'll make it happen. funny how i knew this all along, but now i really take it to heart.